Back Away

by Alyssa Scherer 

 

*please leave your message after the beep*

 

Hey, it’s me again, you still haven’t answered the phone.

 

I’ve been wanting to talk to you.

Wanting to reach out.

Find out what exactly happened, y’know

 

What uh,

What made you run?

I’m not really sure if I can ask that yet,

But you were the one who left out of nowhere.

 

I guess it wasn’t quite out of nowhere,

I mean I do remember you not seeming…

Safe?

By yourself, at one point.

But I thought we moved past that,

I thought you got better, you told me you got better.

 

Momma told me that you were starting to learn geometry,

I remember that from freshman year.

How I used to tell you to beware the coaches teaching math, and

You would laugh after making a corny joke about them.

How you’d hug me and wipe the tears off my face around finals.

I remember seeing your final tears.

 

How they glistened in the sun as I held your body close to mine,

I absorbed the warmth of the rays hoping to transfer them to you.

 

Do you miss me?

Like I miss you?

 

I miss waking up and seeing you jump onto my bed in excitement,

Not jumping in front of the tracks.

 

I miss your shy embraces,

Not the limp emptiness I felt when I held you close.

 

I miss the day you were home, back in bed.

Back in my arms,

Back in my room,
Back away from the tracks,

BACK AWAY FROM THE TRACKS

BACK AWAY, BACK AWAY,
BACK AWAY, BACK-

 

In April 2010.

 

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