by Jha'zhae Ponder
It’s a vice that whispers dark secrets
It’s a controlling wave of energy that overcomes you
It’s a tug-of-war between the mind and body
It’s an apprehension that trumps everything
The constant revelations of utter less thoughts
The force of nature that captures you in its webs
The mind-altering foreboding of it
The bondage that clings onto your soul
I’m heavy under the weight of it
I’m desperate for the opportunity to hold its hand
I'm petrified of the side effects
I’m most deserving of the consequences of my actions
It keeps me grounded
Yet, I’m drowning inside of it
Will it kill me before I stop it?
Will I perish, before I utter a sound?
If I let it win, then I’m at the end of my blue-black road
What if it already won the fracas?
What if I’m decrepit to its vowels?
Will God’s intervention be enough?
I yearn to tame the fiend before the gasoline subdues me to purgatory